There’s one of those moments that will hit you. An Epiphany. Sometimes it’s in the form of just the right punch line to a joke, sometimes, it’s realizing you can make a difference in someone’s life, and sometimes it is when you find just the right gift for the right situation. Enter the glass rooster.
Here’s the situation. I got invited to a home warming party. It’s for a couple of old friends that I used to work at Souper Salad with. It was one of the greatest jobs I’ve ever had and made so many great friends. It was a job that never really paid the bills fully, but you had so much fun there it was hard to leave. Even when I worked full time as a Tandem Mainframe operator, I still worked on the side there to make some extra scratch and hang out with my friend Mark Caulkins. Throughout the years I’d worked there, I’d been kind of known as a goofy funny kid. Not much as changed, but Souper Salad doesn’t exist anymore and this is a good opportunity to see old friends.
The invitation said “no gifts”, but seriously who ever listens to that. Not that I’m going to go out and buy a crystal vase or anything ridiculous, but I needed to bring something. My plan was to go to Marshalls and pick out something crazy, leaning towards the side of ugly. Not so much to be a jerk, although that’s a bonus, but for that golden moment when someone opens a bad gift and they’re forced to pretend they like it. I was thinking of a beaded monkey or perhaps a gilded pig, but then like a shining beacon from heaven, my eyes landed upon the rooster. The sound dropped from my ears and a moment of vertigo took over. There was nothing existing in this world at that moment aside from this hand blown glass cock from China. How could I resist. I walked around Marshalls with it clutched to my body like a Heisman trophy. Tucked into the crook of my arm so as not to drop it, it was more precious than a Ming Vase.
Look at it. It’s hard to look away, and it’s stunning in its ridiculousness. It came in at a whopping $7.99 because it was from Marshalls, but I think it would be safe to say that if it were at a gallery in Portland it would fetch hundreds. From the side, it catches the light just right and if you listen close enough you can hear the faint whisper of angels singing. But from the front, it looks like a full on infected pecker. And I don’t mean that in the sense that he’s a foul and eat with his pecker, I’m referring to if this were a flower, it would be the stamen.
Giddily I went home and snapped a couple of pix of it to capture the beauty, and wrapped it up until it unveiling on Saturday. I don’t really know for sure what my friends will think of their rooster, but I sure hope the moment is awkward. Because if you can’t take joy in the awkward moment of a young couple unwrapping a glass cock, what can you really take joy in?
Here’s the situation. I got invited to a home warming party. It’s for a couple of old friends that I used to work at Souper Salad with. It was one of the greatest jobs I’ve ever had and made so many great friends. It was a job that never really paid the bills fully, but you had so much fun there it was hard to leave. Even when I worked full time as a Tandem Mainframe operator, I still worked on the side there to make some extra scratch and hang out with my friend Mark Caulkins. Throughout the years I’d worked there, I’d been kind of known as a goofy funny kid. Not much as changed, but Souper Salad doesn’t exist anymore and this is a good opportunity to see old friends.
The invitation said “no gifts”, but seriously who ever listens to that. Not that I’m going to go out and buy a crystal vase or anything ridiculous, but I needed to bring something. My plan was to go to Marshalls and pick out something crazy, leaning towards the side of ugly. Not so much to be a jerk, although that’s a bonus, but for that golden moment when someone opens a bad gift and they’re forced to pretend they like it. I was thinking of a beaded monkey or perhaps a gilded pig, but then like a shining beacon from heaven, my eyes landed upon the rooster. The sound dropped from my ears and a moment of vertigo took over. There was nothing existing in this world at that moment aside from this hand blown glass cock from China. How could I resist. I walked around Marshalls with it clutched to my body like a Heisman trophy. Tucked into the crook of my arm so as not to drop it, it was more precious than a Ming Vase.
Look at it. It’s hard to look away, and it’s stunning in its ridiculousness. It came in at a whopping $7.99 because it was from Marshalls, but I think it would be safe to say that if it were at a gallery in Portland it would fetch hundreds. From the side, it catches the light just right and if you listen close enough you can hear the faint whisper of angels singing. But from the front, it looks like a full on infected pecker. And I don’t mean that in the sense that he’s a foul and eat with his pecker, I’m referring to if this were a flower, it would be the stamen.
Giddily I went home and snapped a couple of pix of it to capture the beauty, and wrapped it up until it unveiling on Saturday. I don’t really know for sure what my friends will think of their rooster, but I sure hope the moment is awkward. Because if you can’t take joy in the awkward moment of a young couple unwrapping a glass cock, what can you really take joy in?
2 comments:
Best wishes!
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